I just made out with a guy for $7.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
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