Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
okay pat passed out under dana's car
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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