Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
