is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
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