I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Mom said you looked used
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Randomize
