DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize