Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
