STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
