I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Randomize
