go do what you do best...puke behind churches
We need to rekindle our bromance
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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