Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
