bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
