i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Randomize