I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
