He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Verdict: uncircumcised.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize