But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Randomize
