if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
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