Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
