So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
tell me about the fingering
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
