i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
