I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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