All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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