Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
