Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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