My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
