I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
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