rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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