so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
You've changed since you got that strap on
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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