we're blogging at a bar
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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