at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
This can only be settled by a dance off.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
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