You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Randomize
