I faked an abortion last night.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize