If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize