Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
