Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
