1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
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