doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
