You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
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