Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I think my fart just growled at me.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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