So drunk, too bad you don't want this
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
When are your genitals available?
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Randomize
