Pappa wants mamma naked
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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