wat bout pragnant strippers??
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
