i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
