then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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