well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
So here I am, sexting at work.
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