Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
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he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
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I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
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