the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
