why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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