i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
This is my gift to your gina
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
