Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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